Hellhounds of Chaos is a casual raiding guild on the (US) Hellscream server. Established 09/30/05 by our Guild Master, Corasha, we started as a leveling guild and slowly but surely edged our way into raiding, clearing ZG and MC just before the release of the Burning Crusade. Now, much to the surprise of most people, we are successfully making our way through BC content. Currently we've cleared Kara, Gruuls, Mag, SSC, TK, Mt Hyjal and BT and have cemented our spot in Sunwell with a Kalecgos kill. We now spend our days waiting for WoTLK, chipping away at further Sunwell progression and exploring our sexualities while enjoying sweet sweet pudding.
Note To Members: When registering to the website, apply with the name of your main toon in HoC to take advantages of the added features we pay Guildomatic for. Mazal Tov.
Note To Those Wishing to Apply: You need to register with the website, after an email confirmation, you will be able to apply. (You do not need to wait for us to give you any sort of access). Simply click "Apply Now" under the Guild Applications box on the left side of this screen. Then just answer the questions and submit :) Good luck!
Hey all, I don't normally stream news here but I thought Id make an exception:
Irvine, California- With over 11 million accounts fueling their pocket books Blizzard Entertainment announced today that it was purchasing the planet of Mars from Walmart for an estimated 2.3 Billion dollars with the intent to turn it into a real world Azeroth.
Walmart had been planning to use the planet as a launch-pad for their inter-galactic chain of stores, declaring in August that they had "conquered the feeble consumers of Earth and have now turned [their] intentions to the Universe," but cited a declining economy as a reason to not pursue that at this time.
Blizzard CEO Mike Morhaime released this statement Monday: "Blizzard and our partner companies have always looked for ways to raise our game to the next level. Recently Wrath of the Lich King became the most popular game in Earths history. To top that, we needed to do something big, nobody believed that a World of Warcraft expansion would do this well, nobody thought that a third RTS about the warcraft universe (Warcraft 3) would do as well as it did, but both times we showed a vision for the future and both times succeeded. Now we look to make history again, with the same spirit and vision we put towards all of our projects, we are pleased to announce that we have purchased Mars and will be turning it into a real life Azeroth."
The landmark move caused a flurry of questions that a Blizzard representative addressed yesterday: "To start, we need to make the air breathable, as well as build up a stronger atmosphere, and we will achieve this by literally covering the surface of mars with the seeds of plants that we know A) Can survive and thrive in the Carbon Dioxide rich atmosphere of Mars, and B) Can add the necessary amount of oxygen needed, and C) Can ultimately achieve the right balance of Carbon, Nitrogen, and Oxygen to support New Azeroth. We haven't finalized all of the plants that will be used to achieve this, but we know that for sure we will be using the alfalfa plant, for its amazing resilliance and relative Oxygen output, so we have begun mass producing alfalfa seeds."
Once the atmosphere is altered as such, Blizzard believes that the Ice caps at the North and South poles of Mars will melt. A NASA estimation in 2007 stated that there was enough water in these ice caps to cover all of mars in 11 meters of water. "Obviously we can't have the whole planet be water, thats where our "secret project" comes in", stated the Blizzard rep. For a few years people have been rumoring about a "secret project" that Blizzard has covertly been working on. "Our secret project is actually not a game at all, but rather an intergalactic spacecraft with a laser capable of altering the terrain of any planet roughly the size of the Earth... or in this case, Mars. The spacecraft is equipped with a Nitro-Gas-HyperTerminal-Electro Laser Firegun, or NiGHtELF. The NiGHtELF is capable of emitting a concentrated reverse particle acceleration grappling ray that can latch onto the surface of a planet in a beam about the size of Rhode Island and pull the ground upward." Blizzard plans on using this to raise the continent of Kalimdor and Eastern Kingdoms out of the soon-to-be-flooded planet of Mars.
This northern portion of Mars is soon to become Northrend
But dynamically reshaping the planet and creating a massive new atmosphere is only the easy part. From there Blizzard will have to create the subzones and creatures that make Azeroth what it is. "Perhaps one of our Biggest challenges will be the zones," said lead designer Jeff Kaplan, "Take Southern Kalimdor for example, you have a lush Forest in Un'goro, literally touching the barren wastes of Silithus, it won't be easy."
As for creatures, Blizzard has already begun genetically altering boars, wolves, bears, and the other creatures readily available on Earth to have their sight shortened to 6 feet. "If we want to mimic the aggro radius you see in game now, were gonna need to make these creatures next to blind." said Kaplan, "We will also have to feed them since they show no desire to hunt, as well as rotate them out for subs so that they can sleep." As for murlocs, naga, quilboars, centaurs, and the other humanoids not currently in existence "...for those, we will have to again, you guessed it, use genetic modification." He went on to say “we can really be a boon to humanity here, not only can we create awesome creatures in a real game, but we can use socially unwanted humans to do so, such as those living in Arkansas.”
The most difficult job, creature-wise, for Blizzard, will be replicating the demons seen through-out the game, but Blizzard already has a plan for that. “We have our research team already sorting through black magic, myths, mainstream magic and all sorts of paranormal magics… once we learn the magics secrets, we will begin using said magic recklessly.” Said designer Tom Chilton, “History tells us that using magic recklessly will attract demons from the far reaches of the universe, and once they are here, we simply capture them, reduce their sight to 6 feet, teach them their skills, like mana drain or cleave, and set them out there. The same technique should be easily applied to demon bosses as well.”
The biggest obstacle may yet be reviving players that have died, which Blizzard has ultimately said they have not yet figured out, but a Blizzard rep did say "We aren't gonna let a little thing like reincarnating the dead slow down blizzard Entertainment."
Blizzard also briefly outlined the log-in log-out processes that players will go through. “Every game copy sold will come with a personal shuttle pod that will take the player to one of four intergalactic space-stations located in New York, Germany, South Korea, and Australia. From there, players will board one of the ships that depart every two minutes to Mars. Once in orbit, your personal shuttle pod will have remembered where you logged out and take you there in no time. We believe that this whole process will take 8-11 minutes, and while that’s a substantial increase from what log in time is now, we believe players will respond favorably.”
When asked whether or not Outland could be added, another Blizzard rep said “That’s definitely in the cards, we have already drawn up plans to blow up Saturn by reversing the NiGHtELF. But while we think the lower right quadrant of Saturn would make a suitable Outland, we just don’t know at this point… that’s why we built an intergalactic spaceship instead of just an interplanetary one, so we can explore all the options.”
The announcement has drawn shrewd critics pointing out flaws at every turn, but CEO Mike Morhaime was not phased, “People laughed at us when we raised the level cap to 70, and that turned out great. Well those same people are laughing again, and you know what? I see good things to come.”
Despite the estimated 124 Quadrillion dollar price tag, Blizzard expects the monthly fee to remain at $15 a month.
Congratulations Corrahn! In honor of this momentous occasion, I have made this banner thingy that people can/will copy into their signatures on our forums, as well as any other forums that they frequent. Grats again!
Alright, so Illidan took us a little longer then we had hoped. Why? Why is the sky blue or the grass green? Its all relative to the speed that we cleared to him. Nothing really compared to Kael, so two weeks a boss has been what we are used to. Of course we got to Illidan and he wasn’t really as easy as everyone said he was. Most of the problems being the infamous phase two. Our biggest problem in phase 2 was Blood Elf Rogue Leetfade’s constant attempts to pirouette jump over the eyebeams as they came down. In honor of leetfade, I present images of leetfade jumping over other things that would kill him:
Here’s Leetfade jumping over a car accident:
Here’s Leetfade jumping over AIDS:
Here’s Leetfade jumping over terrorists:
And finally, here’s Leetfade jumping over a Vitamin B3 and Tryptophan deficiency:
Of course I'm kidding when I blame leetfade, he only ever tried that once :P. To spread the jesting around, lets not forget that eye beams wreaked havoc on our tanks early on as well. In this professional recreation of an HoC Illidan phase 2, you will see what I mean. In this re-enactment, our flame tanks are portrayed by the security guard, and the eyebeams are portrayed by the steamroller. Watch and enjoy:
IM JUST KIDDING I LOVE YOU GUYS YOU DID AWESOME! <3 <3 <3 <3 and also many more hearts
Slowly backing into reality, after 10, 7, and 13% wipes we decided to venture into extra innings. Lady luck finally cut us some slack when at 8% Maiev dropped a trap right next to our MT, and we zerged him down. Really didn’t need the trap probably, but it was a nice gift. Speaking of our tank, I’d like to thank not only Kaz’rogal, but also Jan’Alai: Thank you guys, for not dropping your shields after being farmed for six months. Thank you for forcing our MT to tank Illidan with an Aldori Legacy Defender from Gruul. And Loji almost didn’t even get the shield from Gruul, if anyone remembers, it was on our last night of gruuls lair that it finally dropped. Not to mention Nightbanes inability to drop shields. So we very well could’ve had our Main Tank tanking Illidan with a Platinum Shield of the Valorous. I guess this is where I chime in about the RNG loot system… but im gonna pass, and hope that Illidan rewards us soon enough.
And finally, when your flame tanks get lazored, and you throw out the mandatory “what happened there?” a raid leader would expect to hear in return, “Sorry, I saw it too late.” Or, “I thought I was clear.” But when posing this question tonight to a certain, normally very quiet and polite feral druid, I did not expect to hear “Sorry, my husband was pinching my nipples.”… Well, I’m pretty sure all guilds wipe to that at some point anyway.
So I’ll end with a BC victory speech. Yes I know about sunwell, but if you’ve been around a while and followed Hellscream guilds for a while you know why any progress we make in there is moot to the point. The point being that a guild consistently wiping on spider boss pre-BC stormed through, made new friends, kicked the really crappy players, (although it sometimes took us an agonizing amount of time to do so) over the course of BC, and winding up taking down Illidan as a horde 5th, server 11th, , is.. well, a pretty special accomplishment for us. I’d like to take credit, but we all know that its Corasha, through building relationships, making everyone happy, going after the very best free agents on the server with blazing guns, she’s really the glue that holds the ship afloat.
And of course all of our raiders, who seemingly never know when they are in over their heads.
